“Life is a series of natural and spontaneous changes.
Don’t resist them; that only creates sorrow.
Let reality be reality.
Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like.” ― Lao Tzu
Have you ever worked with or been around someone who wore their underwear
way too tight and definitely starched them?
They can barely flex their thinking, have extremely rigid rituals and look like a deer (with tighty-whiteys… now that’s a visual you probably haven’t imagined!) in the headlights when you ask them to consider a fresh-way of thinking.
The most fascinating part about these types of people… they truly believe (in their minds) their thinking
is analogous to the perfectly fitted attire worn by a runway model from Victoria Secret or GQ!
Flip this around, and the most creative thinkers / doers in the Game of Life, see themselves as too rigid and are constantly trying to get better. Meanwhile the rigid ones are trying to tell everyone how to think!
It seems there are at least 3 consistent components of the Starched, Too-Tight Underwear Crowd.
- Listening is “Average” or “Below Average”. This seems self-explanatory.
- Trying to maintain their position authority professionally or personally (vs. growing) is critical to them. When they have what they want, any change they believe might create the possibility of them losing whatever “it” is… is too threatening.
- Interestingly, this approach is the most common way to push Amazing people or opportunities out of your life.
- This is the exact opposite of what the Undersized, Over-Starched Crowd wants, but they lack the ability to embrace Unorthodoxly Amazing… because it is… unorthodox.
- Being vulnerable is too uncomfortable for them to consider or actually practice. Warning! The more holistically talented you are… the more you’ll intimidate the Undersized, Over-Starched Crowd.
So… how do you avoid getting into relationships with the conforming, traditionalists?
- Determine if they genuinely appreciate you and all your warts, particularly the warts they’ll never fully understand about you.
- Determine if they use “We” decision making aligned with the relationship or “I” decision making aligned with self-centeredness.
- Many can use “We” decision making on routine decisions, but on jugular decisions… often their “I Decision Maker” takes control.
- Their “I Decision Maker” can be so strong… that merely discussing jugular decision before they make an “I” decision… isn’t even a consideration… because this would make them vulnerable while requiring them to listen.
- Determine if they are working their ass off to understand you while growing as an individual to elevate the relationship.
If you ask someone, “What is the difference between a regular old rock and a diamond?”, they typically will share several accurate attributes. The obvious difference is how rare diamonds are and how common rocks are.
You can shine a rock every day, buy the best rock shiner from Amazon… but in the end… it’s still a rock… not a diamond!
Diamonds are rare. Find the rough diamonds, regardless of how unorthodoxly they fit into your life and stop being surrounded by rocks that you’re trying to shine into diamonds!
Lastly; be flexibly intelligent… skip the starch… flex with Lycra!
Are you a Rock… or a Diamond committed to making (not just talking) a Significant Social Impact in other people’s lives?
Would you like to create $100+ Thousand a month for Your Favorite Non-Profits?
DM me on LinkedIn or directly (jim.roncevich@ipgsocialimpact.com).
Who changes the world? I believe it’s almost exclusively the Top-7%. They are the only ones with the Talent Portfolios and social consciences needed to actually implement significant positive social impact.
If you believe you’re one of these executives, we’d love to explore possible opportunities.
Get MAD! Get Making A Difference! ~ JR
