“The trouble with most of us is that we’d
rather be ruined by praise than saved by criticism.”
.
– Norman Vincent Peale
How would you rate your competency; “Handling Constructive Criticism”?
Sounds like a simple enough question; but it’s actually quite complicated.
Why? There are at least two broad answers and one array of situational answers to this question. It depends on:
- Who is asking the question.
- What is at stake.
- An endless combination of #1 & #2.
Who is Asking the Question – Just consider the range of possibilities.
- Boss
- Spouse
- Co-Worker
- Child
- Industry Peer
- Person you like
- Person you don’t like
- Etc.
What is at Stake – Just consider the range of consequences.
- New Job or No Job
- Promotion or Demotion
- Marriage or Divorce
- Awesome or Terrible Professional or Personal Relationship
- Amazing or Mediocre part of your Life Journey
An Endless Combination of #1 and #2 – You can pretty much figure out the myriad of possible situations unique to your life, using your DMQ (Decision Making Quality) to optimize a purpose-driven life (if you so choose that path) or pursue whatever type of path you believe is best for you (bounded by the downside and upside of your DMQ).
Why is Handling Constructive Criticism A Valuable Competency – In the interest of brevity; the simple answer is, because it’s an excellent growth opportunity.
The key, is what we learn from our constructive criticism experiences, with the most critical tool for learning, being our DMQ-Filters.
During a coaching call I was providing this week, we were discussing how constructive criticism from the wrong people in your life is actually a complement.
You want people that don’t genuinely listen to, appreciate, etc., you, to criticize you. In a nutshell, you’re not like them and that should make you happy.
However; as most of you know, top-talent’s goal is always to be the “dumbest person in the room”. If you’ll recall from previous blogs, this doesn’t mean you’re dumb. It actually means you’re quite sharp.
Example: You’re an 8.7 (10.0 = theoretically perfect), but your spouse, inner-circle, etc., are an average of 9.2. Awesome!
Thus; receiving constructive criticism from 9.2’s means your listening, asking questions, etc., in order to become a better holistic leader. This enables you to:
- Have no regrets at the end of your life
- Enjoy more spectacular (vs. not-so-good to average) years in your life
- Be a difference maker in the lives of so many others
Important: While we’re learning from people more talented than us, when they provide us constructive criticism, it may very well:
- Not be understood (we may not have developed enough capacity to understand their knowledge base; yet).
- Not be appreciated (and even piss us off).
- Not be believed, since we don’t believe it’s accurate (we foolishly think we understand what they’re sharing with us (but, we unknowingly don’t) and it pisses us off).
- Be listened to, not understood, but “retained for further processing” later. Awesome!
Wow! A lot to take in on this blog!
Have you deeply appreciated the professional and personal opportunities you’ve been availed in your life, in order to use them to give back to those less fortunate?
If you haven’t collaborated with us to donate $1M+ to your favorite charities…
… here’s a little constructive criticism…
… those in need are waiting on you to step up and make a difference!
The downside; it’ll take 7-10 hours of your time this year.
Who changes the world? I believe it’s almost exclusively the Top-7%. They are the only ones with the Talent Portfolios and social consciences needed to actually implement significant positive social impact.
If you believe you’re one of these executives, we’d love to explore possible opportunities.
Get MAD! Get Making A Difference! ~ JR
